1.17.09 (<-- All Odd Numbers)

What a weekend! I don't think I have ever been on an emotional roller coaster quite like this one. A lot of fantastic things happened and several sad/frustrating things happened. I haven't had a chance to really let it all sink in until now. I feel like I'm in quick sand.

On Thursday I received a call from my mom. She let me know that my grandad passed out the night before and the doctors found a blood clot in his lung that morning. He also had an incredibly weak heart. The doctor's weren't terribly pessimistic, but they did tell my parents that a trip to Florida was in their best interest. My mom was terribly frightened for her dad's health but was also sad that this meant they would miss Kait and Steve's wedding. We hung up just as I arrived at my hair appointment. I sat in the chair and my stylist asked the million dollar question that always sets me off: "Is everything ok?" Have you ever bawled your eyes out at a salon? Because I have. It wasn't pretty. I felt (and still feel) so helpless. I've never wanted to be with my mom more in my life. What does it feel like when you find out your lifelong hero is sick? There have been many times my mom has said she wished she could take my burdens and carry them herself. Sometimes she succeeded. All I wanted on Thursday was to be able to return the favor. And I couldn't. My heart hurt for both of them.

Friday morning I was up at 5a and on my way to StL for my best friend's wedding. The day was full of preparations and day-before-wedding excitement. Being the matron of honor, I was to give a speech at the wedding reception. Folks, 5 years ago I would have loved nothing more. I used to thrive on presentations. I'm not sure when the big switch happened, but I have been terrified about this speech from the moment I found out I was to give one. I had nightmares about being the one glitch in her otherwise perfect day. That being said, I wrote the speech about 9 months ago and practiced it daily for the past 3 weeks. Every morning shower, every car ride, and every time I woke up at 3a in the morning I would recite the speech. I spent most of Friday and ALL of Saturday with a nervous twitch.

The rehearsal/rehearsal dinner were great and we all had a fantastic time. We saw some great pictures of Kait and Steve when they were little and it was so good to have our group of friends reunited. Several of us went to a bar afterwards before we headed back to the hotel.

Saturday I woke up in a bewildered state of excitement (wedding), anxiousness (speech), and fear (grandad). While I was getting my hair/makeup done, I received a call from my mom saying grandad was doing much, much better and I was able to remove fear from my emotion bank and replace it with gratitude. Things were looking up! We went from the salon to Kait's house and got ready. I took a good glimpse of myself in the mirror and started humming Elton John's "Tiny Dancer." I'd seen a great picture of Heidi Klum with her hair pulled back and thought I could do the same. With my "smoky eyes" and pulled back hair I was a dead ringer for a ballerina on crack. Can't win them all. Sigh.

Kait was the perfect bride. Calm, cool, and very much collected. I was in awe. She acted like she got married every day (for those of you that don't know her, this was, in fact, her first wedding). The ceremony was beautiful. Afterwards, we spent about an hour taking pictures outside (brrrr) and then it was off to the reception. By this point my heart was doing everything it could to remove itself from my chest. I barely touched my dinner (which was unfortunate because it was delicious) and then it was go-time. Her sister and I walked up to the front and I gave the speech I'd recited so many times before. I did fine. Nothing extraordinary but no huge slip-ups. Used my cheat card twice. Even managed to get a few laughs from the crowd. Glory. It was over. I went back to my seat and ate my cake in pure bliss. The rest of the night was spent dancing, drinking, and having a fabulous time.

A quick math equation for you:

Meredith
PLUS
Red wine
PLUS
Good band
MINUS
Inhibitions
MINUS
Self-respect
MULTIPLIED BY
Several more glasses of red wine
= January 17, 2009

This is getting rather long so I think I will write the rest tomorrow. Stay tuned for the Prius' first brush with fate (fate = white town car), an update on grandad (he is alive and doing well), pictures from the wedding, and a ridiculously emotional Merd. I'm sure you can barely stand the wait.