I Wish I Could Blame It On A Robber...

I want to describe what our house looks like right now but I have typed and deleted five different phrases because each involved a severe expletive. And I'm trying to keep it classy here. So just close your eyes and imagine a home that has been completely ransacked and destroyed. The only difference is the robber decided not to take anything but instead politely wrapped all breakable items in white packaging paper (thank you, robber).

I don't know how some people do it. We are not a couple who loves "stuff." I am a firm believer that just because there is a bare surface does not mean it needs to hold eight ceramic figurines. But once we started putting everything in boxes, our few valuable goods gave rabbits a run for their money. It's not pretty.

My biggest fear is we'll rent Mr. Gigantor Uhaul and our stuff won't all fit. And then what? Ugh, just the thought of it makes me cringe so let's move on.

After an entire month of badgering the insurance company, my car is finally in the shop and will soon be the proud owner of a new bumper. I attempted to drop off my car twice last week and was turned away each time due to some misunderstanding. The rental place felt so badly for me that they upgraded me to an Equinox. I had no idea what that meant.

The convo went something like this:

Dude: Well, the insurance has you down for a small car (smirk, laugh) but I think we can take care of that for you. How about an upgrade to an Equinox?
Me: Ok. (no idea)
Dude: Here's your key!
Me: ....
Dude: It's right over there.
Me: Which one?
Dude: The one in the back.
Me: Yeah... I have no idea which one is the Equinox.
Dude: The black one over there...
Me: (Glancing at the 4 black cars in the back) ...
Dude: (Blink. Blink blink. Blink.) Ok, let me show you. (Walks me to the driver's seat of the car.)
Me: Ohhh! It's an SUV. Nice!
Dude: Ma'am, you are a complete idiot. (Ok so he didn't say that, but the look he gave me was enough.)

For those of you who are like me and don't really follow Chevy cars, I am the temporary owner of this beast:



I must say, I forgot how fun it is to drive an SUV. I do feel like I need to apologize to every tree and baby I pass. Poooor earth, I'm sorry for my fumes. I will be happy to reunite with my Prius in the next few days.

I guess that's it for now. I would like to give a shout-out to June, the month that gives me my husband back. My last day of work is now June 18 so only 19 days until Thumbs has a dad once again. Woohoo!

Fridays... Er.... Sundays with Evan

I have several pictures to post but I'll save those for Friday. Just thought I'd share these two since we're about to enter the month dedicated to all of the fantastic fathers out there. :)




Oh and before I go, here's a fun song for you.

Way Back Hairday

Because Way Back Wednesday is much more fun when it's shared with the one you love...

(Senior Prom)


Michael never had any unfortunate stages... but his hair did. Yowza.

And speaking of hair, some of you may have wondered what our future child will look like. I introduce to you... a blonde Michael Haynes. I guess the entire soccer team bleached their hair, including my husband:



He pulled it off quite well, but I think I prefer it a wee bit darker. :)

In other news...

My friend Erin Nickell tagged me so here you go! I like to pretend that being tagged is no big deal but HOLY CRAP I LOVE IT! Regardless, I think I'm going to change "8 things" to "5 things" because my life is pretty boring...

Tag Rules...
1. Mention the person who tagged you.
2. Complete the list of 5's
3. Tag 5 of your wonderful blog friends!

5 things I look forward to:
1. Being in the same city (hell, the same state) as my husband
2. Several months of warm weather and sunny skies
3. Finding a job
4. Visiting every single mall in the Dallas metroplex
5. Jamie's bachelorette party in Vegas and a family vacation to Florida (Oh Evan, get ready...)

5 things I did yesterday:
1. Purchased a pair of shoes (on sale!) and some summery nail polish.

2. Walked around our neighborhood with the mum
3. Worked on the layout for the church's new website
4. Wrote a blog post
5. Stared at the 3 boxes I packed this past weekend

5 things I wish I could do:
1. Paint/draw/etc.
2. Run 5 miles without leaving a lung on the pavement
3. Go back to Hawaii with Michael
4. Convince everyone that respecting our president (even if you don't agree with the guy) is the right thing to do
5. Get a job (yes, I've mentioned this twice. Thanks.)

5 shows I watch:
1. 30 Rock
2. The Office
3. LOST
4. Biggest Loser
5. Arrested Development (I know it's no longer on tv but it was fantastic)

5 Bloggers I Tag (If you can't tell, I picked you because you haven't written a blog post in a looooong time. So I'm making it easy for you!)
1. Lisa
2. Heather H
3. Chris L (Do you even read my blog? I'm not sure you'll even see this. Whatev.)
4. Annie M
5. Karen L

Memorial Weekend: Fantastic

Isn't our flag a beaut? I hope everyone had a wonderful Memorial Day weekend.

I loved having Michael home for three days--it was so much better than our typical two. I'd actually come pretty far in our six weeks of long-distance but that extra day brought me right back to the beginning. I miss him so much today. Only a few more weeks and we will be together again. We went out to eat a few times, watched some great movies, and had an ice cream date at the Riverwalk. I loved every minute.

Let's talk about our neighborhood pool. Keep in mind, Michael and I are the weird couple in the neighborhood. Weird = no kids. After Michael left yesterday I sauntered off to the pool with my sunscreen in hand, sunglasses on, InStyle under my arm, and a smile on my face. As I got closer to the pool I heard the familiar sound of kids laughing. As I got even closer, I also heard the screaming, temper tantrums, and adults yelling.... My steps became smaller and smaller, slower and slower. But I'd already seen the pool so there was no turning back. I lifted my chin and walked into total mass chaos.

I have this problem where I think everyone watches me as I walk to my lounge chair. I don't mean it in the cocky, narcissistic way, I mean it in the, "What the heck is SHE doing here?" kind of way. Watching, judging, you get my drift. I know I stick out at our pool. I rarely wear my wedding ring (suncreen + wedding ring = ew), I do not own (nor do I ever plan to own) a mom swimsuit, and my biggest concern is whether or not my iPod's battery is going to last long enough for me to fall asleep. I then spend the next half hour wondering what the neighbors think of me. Am I the 27-year-old daughter who refuses to leave her parents house? Am I the mistress of the 55-year-old soccer dad? Am I all alone but have a lucrative job? When really, I have to believe they don't even notice me at all. And I can't decide which is worse. I'm the type who loves to analyze people and imagine their life story. I'll never know if I'm right or wrong but it's a fun (albeit childish) game and I refuse to give it up. Do any of you do this or do I need to see someone for an extreme anxiety disorder?

Regardless, I managed to lay out for over an hour without getting pegged in the eye by a football. Nice! I made eye contact with exactly one person, watched over a dozen kids play "Marco Polo," listened to two parents argue over the dinner menu, and eventually left feeling just as isolated as when I arrived. This whole being alone business? Yeah, I'm so over it.

Choose Your Own Title

The only thing better than a 3-day weekend is... actually, let me try that again. There is NOTHING better than a 3-day weekend. And the fact that it is beautiful and sunny just makes my heart happy.

I wish I had some updates for you but nothing new at the moment. Oh wait, I DO have an update. Evan is well on his way to running a marathon. Justin and Michelle sent us a video last night and he is crawling, people! It is not the crawl of a professional but it is forward movement! Pretty sure he can do more push-ups than me, which is not embarrassing at all.

If you watch this video (which I advise because, hey! It's Friday and we're about to have a 3-day weekend--live a little!), please notice the part where Justin moves the toy out of his reach. I had all sorts of flashbacks of Justin doing similar things to me as a kid and I became ridiculously irritated for Evan's sake. Jeez dad, no need to be rude. Only kidding, I know that's what you do to get them to move but it is a bit heartbreaking when he's so close and then... nope, out of reach. Again.

Here it is:

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing

And Fridays with Evan continues... The happy family traveled to Niagara Falls so here are a few pictures from their trip.

Way Back Wedding

Well I was a bad sister/sister-in-law last week so I'm hoping to make up for it with my Way Back Wednesday dedication.

Justin and Michelle celebrated their 5th wedding anniversary last Friday! In honor of the lovely couple, my WBW pictures are from their dress rehearsal and wedding. I have more but these were the only two I could find on my computer so I apologize for not having a picture of the two lovebirds together.

Happy anniversary!! It feels like the past five years have flown, but at the same time it's hard to remember Justin without Michelle. I guess that's why they belong together. :) You are a fantastic couple and while I've (almost) always known I was blessed with a great brother, I couldn't have asked for a better sister. I know I spent the last three years trying to convince you two to move to Tulsa but the latest report says Dallas is where it's at. So... pack your bags!! :)

House Vs. Home

A month after Michael and I married, I asked if we could visit an open house I'd found in the paper that morning. We both knew we weren't in the market to buy but I thought it was never too early to start the search. I don't remember the drive there or pulling up to the house but I will never forget walking inside the front door. My heart lifted and sank at the same time. This was our home. This was the one. Unfortunately, we weren't ready to purchase a home. As I took the tour, each room was prettier than the last. I already knew where several pieces of our furniture would fit and had a laundry list of items we'd need to buy. The realtor politely asked, "Do you know what you want? What did you have in mind?" And I just reached out my arms and said "This."

This was our dream home. So we made it work. And it has been our dream home for 17 glorious months.

When Michael told me he'd received the job in Dallas, my heart once again lifted and sank. New place, new friends, new shopping (!!!). But at the cost of moving away from old friends, old jobs, old stomping grounds, and our home.

The yard has seen dead sod, green grass, a tree planted on our 1-year anniversary, and most recently, a for sale sign. It was supposed to see so much more.

I wondered if it was going to be hard for us to leave our home. The home where we spent many nights staying up late discussing which bedroom would be the nursery one day, which paint color needed to go, which tree would be planted next...

Then Michael left. And our home became a house--a house that's keeping me away from my husband. In an instant, my dream home became an enormous burden. We are set to close June 12 and that day could not come soon enough. Every time I kiss Michael goodbye I silently curse the wooden floors we're standing on--the same floors that made me giddy not long ago.

Isn't it strange how perceptions change? I love (to make fun of) cheesy statements. But whoever coined the phrase, "Home is where the heart is" knew what was going on because this house hasn't been a home for a month. And boy am I ready to come home.

27! I'm A Perfect Cube!

Well I've been 27 for almost two days. So far, so good. Thanks for the calls, emails, texts, facebook messages, twitters, etc. It's obnoxious how many different ways you can wish someone a happy birthday now. I remember I wished one of my good friends "Happy Birthday" five different ways last year. It was exhausting.

Speaking of exhausting, I am SO incredibly sleepy. Had a fabulous birthday with Michael this weekend and with my mom yesterday. Michael's gift to me was a pair of beeeeeautiful sunglasses. Ask to see them, I'd love to show you. And I was so thankful my mom was able to come up yesterday so we could celebrate my birthday and Mother's Day.

In other news, our house is officially SOLD (as of Monday). If everything goes as planned (famous last words), we close on June 12 and my last day of work is June 11. 4 weeks from tomorrow. I'm so excited about the next step but I am going to miss my church so much. The entire staff is incredible and I have grown so much as a person because of their guidance. Ahhh tear.

This post is all over the place.

Oh! It's Way Back Wednesday time. I had a few pictures and couldn't decide on one so I'm posting all three. One picture is from my 21st birthday (special thanks to Summer for the fantastic sketch) and I'm not sure if the other is from a birthday or just a glorious day of cake-making. Either way, I felt they were both appropriate for this week's post. Also, a few of you asked for pictures from that fabulous talent-show. My mom thinks there is a video (which would self-destruct if I had it my way) but I don't believe there are any pictures. However! I found a 3/4 family picture that was taken around the same time, give or take a year. So there you have it. Three pictures out of the vault.







(Yeah, I know my hair looks like crap. Thank you.)

Let The Rhythm Move You

First, I bring you this...



A little backstory (because when have I ever been one to get straight to the point?): When I transferred to Woods Elementary in the third grade, I knew I needed something in my life: friends. After brainstorming on my penmanship tablet, I realized the best way to make a slew of friends was to be part of our school-wide talent show. And no, my talent was not solving long division in front of a large audience. It was dancing. Oh yes. Before you feel completely sorry for me, please understand that I didn't do a solo dance, I was part of a group. And our song of choice? That gem you just heard. A bunch of very white, very short little girls breaking. It. Down. I don't remember much of the dance except for the running man and the robo-cop. So whenever that song comes on the radio, watch out for these elbows because they are out of control.

On Saturday, Michael and I were driving to the mall and he was making weird robot noises. No idea why, but stuff like that doesn't surprise me anymore. I picked up on his robot noises and started my own robot version of "Everybody Dance Now" so I could do the robo-cop (of course). We were our own car of dorkiness for about 30 seconds before Michael decided he'd had enough with my bad sound effects and killer dance moves. He turned on the radio to catch a break and that is when my birthday weekend turned into THE BEST BIRTHDAY WEEKEND EVEEEEEER! The second he hit the power button our car was filled with that glorious 1990 hit, loud and clear through the speakers.

It was fate I tell ya. And you don't mess with fate. Oh no, you DANCE with fate. And that? Is exactly what I did.

Oh Friday, You Are Fabulous

Alright, I'm going to need you to stop what you're doing and take 8 minutes to listen to this. Pretty incredible. And if you like Taylor Swift and/or Coldplay, I think you'll be quite pleased. :)



And of course it's time for Fridays with Evan, so here you go. He is now six months and cute as ever! 75th percentile for height, 15th percentile for weight. Someone get this kid a basketball!









Hope everyone has a great weekend! Michael has designated this my "birthday weekend" since he will be gone next Tuesday. Oh 27, how I dread you.

Give your mom a huge hug on Sunday and tell her she's wonderful. Because you and I both know she is.

I'm Such A Follower...

There is this thing going around the blogging world (it is not swine flu) and I thought I'd participate. It's called Way Back Wednesday (get it? GET IT?!) and here you go. My Way Back Wednesday:



I would put this picture in my top 5 favorite of all time. My mom took Leslie, Julie, and myself on a "photo shoot" after our freshman year in college. (Why? I have no idea...) We decided to wear black tanks and our jean length of choice. Gah, we were cool.

We were all supposed to have serious faces whilst taking this picture. I have no idea who started laughing first but it is obvious none of us succeeded with the serious face. Which is a little unfortunate since there is nothing funny about being female and having a beard and/or moustache.

And because I can't follow just one trend, here's another. I am now on twitter. We'll see how it goes. My good friend Michael Homan kept talking about it so I succumbed to the little bird world. I figured since our church is now on twitter and I am the communication director it would probably be best to be up to speed. So if you care to follow me, you may look right at my tweet feed on the ol' blog or if you're already part of the phenomenon you can add me!

I'm: merdstheword

And my church is: 1stchurchtulsa

After 26.9 years and many personality tests, I thought I was a leader. But alas, I'm apparently quite the follower.

What's The Plan?

Growing up I loved to roller skate. I believe I had four or five Crystal Palace birthday parties in a row. I adored almost every aspect of that place, including the cute workers who wore black and white striped referee shirts (why did they wear those?). There is one part I hated: limbo. I never cared to know how low I could go. I would play because everyone else would, but I was always so anxious to get to red light/green light or the hokey pokey, because let's face it, that really is what it's all about.

I still hate limbo or being IN limbo. And that stupid limbo stick is hitting me in the face. Every. Single. Day.

One of my many examples: I have a bachelorette party, wedding, and family vacation planned for this summer. None are in Tulsa so I need to book my plane ticket to each event. But wait. Do I book my ticket out of Tulsa? Or out of Dallas? And if I don't have a job by the time I move to Dallas, can I even go to the bachelorette party? What if I do have a job and am living in Dallas, will my new job allow me to go on the aforementioned trips?

Do you see where I'm going here? I am in "Choose Your Own Adventure" hell! I just want to wake up one morning and say, "I am going to (fill in the blank)" and be able to do it. And I can't. And it is driving me crazy.

So I am in the beginning stages of writing all of the possible options down and by the time I'm finished it is going to look like one of those organization charts on PowerPoint. Or if we want to make it personal, a family tree. Start with one little baby and then branch out, branch out, branch out (insert lame Arkansas family tree joke here).

I love to plan. It is one of the only things on God's green earth that I can confidently say I'm good at. One part of wedding planning that most people hate is putting together the seating chart. I had a grin on my face the entire time. LOVED it. (If you want me to put together your seating chart for you, call me. I'm so serious.) And our honeymoon? I planned the entire week. I'm sure some of you are thinking, "Wow, Michael should have done that so you could focus on your wedding." Folks, Michael knows me and knows better. If he'd asked to plan our honeymoon I'm pretty sure my heart would have sunk.

If I could offer some advice to each of you, don't ask me ANYTHING about what I may or may not be doing over the next few months unless you are ready to hear me rattle off a 15-minute schpeel listing all of my options. Had none of this craziness happened I could've given you a play-by-play of our life for the next two years but instead I am doomed to planning one week (and sometimes one day) at a time. I know this is a test and I know that the big man upstairs is laughing at me for ever thinking I was the one in control.

And on that note, I'm off to create the largest family tree-like chart the world has ever seen. John P, your family is going to have NOTHING on this Sequoia.

A Picture Rather Than A 1000 Words

I do believe it is time for a picture post. I appreciate you putting up with so many words lately.

Quick update: Went to Dallas on Monday evening and stayed through Wednesday morning. Met with two recruiters. Won't go into details now but would LOVE to later. My mom came with me so we spent most of Tuesday driving up and down every single street in Dallas. I do not think we missed one. We visited about 5 different suburbs and looked at homes/townhomes that I've been stalking online over the past few weeks. Some were fantastic, others were fantastic but in terrible locations (cue Gangsta's Paradise). As we drove (well mom drove, I gave directions), I became more and more comfortable with my new home. Dallas is pretty amazing and I think I'm going to love it.

So some pictures! The first are from a trip my friends and I took last month to Branson. And while Branson is a fabulous town, we met there because it is right in the middle of Kansas City, St. Louis, and Tulsa.

After lunch it started raining. None of us had umbrellas so we had baileys and coffee while we waited for it to stop.


Touring the world famous Branson Winery...


What do you do when you're old and married? Stay in, play Cranium, and drink wine.




After dinner on Saturday night...


Next are pictures from last weekend. Jennifer and Melissa (high school friends) came to Tulsa and brought their kiddos!!!

What? You didn't know I had a baby?


Ok fine, I don't. (But thanks for letting me borrow him, Melissa...)


And then, of course, your weekly dose of Evan.

Looking cute in overalls from Uncle Mikee and Aunt Merdi


Evan's new thing is to suck on his upper lip...


Following in Schroeder's footsteps...


Such a happy little guy...