Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Life With Twins

Holy cow, I'm actually writing before Jude and Sloane's 3-month post.  Who knew it was possible??

I don't have much time so I'll just start writing and if I stop in the middle of a sentence, please forgive me.  I'll pick it up later.  :)

I'm not sure if Instagram led some of you to my blog or my blog led some of you to Instagram, but there are several new followers (hello!!) and a lot of you are expecting twins or just had them (yahooo)!  I've received a few emails asking for tips and must-haves so I thought I'd share a few on here.  Before I do that, however, I wanted to discuss something else.

From the very beginning, Michael and I have been told we make this whole twin thing look easy. People have commented on Facebook that our babies can sleep anywhere, that they both look perfectly put together, and that Michael and I are "naturals."  While these are all flattering comments, I have to remind everyone that Instagram and Facebook (and this blog) are only a part of our lives--the part I choose to share.  I don't take pictures when the kids are screaming their adorable heads off (though I do take videos and share them with friends--hehe).  I cut myself out of pictures when I'm still wearing pajamas and yesterday's makeup at 5p.  I've also made a point to post pictures of Jude and Sloane in outfits our friends and family give them so that is where people get the (silly) idea that they're always dressed up and fresh-faced.  95% of the time they are in their jammies with spit-up on their shirts and milk in their hair.  And so is their mom.  :)

It's messy.  It's beautiful.  It's life. 

Also, I only know life with twins but I have a difficult time believing it's twice as hard.  A lot of women vent to me about their baby situation and then immediately apologize, but whether it's one baby or four, everyone has extremely difficult moments.  Every single day.  My only frustration is when people complain to me about how many diapers they have to change.  That?  Makes me laugh.  :)

What I want is for new moms and future moms to realize social media can be quite deceptive, even when it's not intended.  Do I ever plan to post pictures of Sloane screaming or Jude with spit-up in his ear?  Probably not.  But does it happen?  Every single day. 

I think I'm on borrowed time so I'm going to end this and save the must-have purchases for a future post.  Hopefully that will occur sometime in January.

And ps. I miss you guys. 


Trish said...

And OMG I'm commenting three hours after you've posted? Must be serendipity. I have various posts drafted that basically say this same thing (though aimed at the question "how do you have time to do it all.") I agree--we allow others to see what we want them to see. But you do look like you are doing an amazing job and have eased into motherhood with...um...ease. Next time I want to be able to hold one of those babies!!

Also--I get distracted by those other posts at the bottom "You might also like:" I didn't realize you had such short hair! Me Likey.

Aubrey said...

Well stated, Merd!

But I find it hard to believe that this post is even necessary. Do other people really need to be reassured that your life isn't always easy? Any person with a brain knows that those spit-up-stained, lank-haired, dark-circled times exist! Deciding not to make those moments public is your prerogative. No one thinks you're being fake by choosing to publicize your golden moments via social media.

Then again, maybe some people do think you're being fake. But that says a lot more about them than it does about you. Anyone who uses a blog, facebook, instagram, etc as a yardstick to see how she compares to another mom has issues that you should not even attempt to tackle.

Moral of this story, all of us moms should cut ourselves some slack. For our sanity, we should enjoy those golden moments whenever they appear without looking over our shoulder to see if someone else is having a BETTER moment than we are...or worrying that someone thinks we are being fake by reveling in the good times with our children.

Courtney Edwards said...

You are silly Meredith. You just always look so graceful handling both twins and must I say it, beautiful! Sorry, I might be the one that complains about diaper changes ;/ Hunter went thru a crazy 2-1/2 months and your right, no sympathy for that when you have 2!

The Single Gal and The Housewife said...

My twins were born on 11/7 so I've been following from your announcement. I have a two year old daughter so it's been crazy at my house going from one to three. My twins are fraternal girls and I have a hard time with establishing the same schedule. They are usually fine during the day but vary at night. I'm glad you were able to breastfeed so well! I'm a little heartbroken I couldn't make it work.

katandkarl said...

Love this. Keep it real, my friend. And keep sharing those gorgeous pics - i can hear them crying two seconds after you snapped the pic! (Er... I mean, that's what NEVER happens at my house!)


Jax said...

Love that you keep it real, gorgeous! Not gonna lie.. Pretty sure that you still look fabulous with milk and spitup in your hair and in yesterday's makeup. Like a crazy person? Probably....but still fabulous. :) And the pics might be taken 2 seconds before meltdown-mageddon 2013 happens, but I love that you keep posting em b/c they're simply adorable. :) I often wonder how many takes you (or anyone with kiddos) goes through to get "the photo." My phone has like 1,400 photos of my dog. So yeah. There's that. Something tells me that'd triple with kids. All I have to do is hold up a treat for Gracie to look interested in the camera... ;) Sending love!

Kaitlin said...

Well dang, I guess the comment I thought I posted didn't. People need to take heart in that Pinterest quote floating around: "Don't compare your behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." We obviously post the good stuff, with a few bad tidbits thrown in for good measure, but clearly there are things we just don't say or show (unlike someone we know, ha!). I know you guys have the crazy/cranky spit-up filled days that I very distinctly remember with L, but I HAVE seen you in action and you are great!


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