Monday, December 23, 2013

30 Minutes

The twins were right in the middle of their morning nap when I realized I needed to use the computer.  I tiptoed up the stairs and quietly sat down at the desk in our living room.  I softly tapped the keys and finished my task in record time.  As I was standing up to head downstairs, I heard her.

Sweet Sloaney was awake.

It'd only been 45 minutes and their morning nap typically lasts several hours.  I peeked in the nursery and there she was, sitting up and looking right at me.  I turned on the sleep sheep and backed out of the room.  She immediately started whimpering.  I knew if I let her cry she'd wake Jude so I did something I'm not sure I've ever done before.

I walked to her crib, picked her up, and carried her to the rocker.  She was so warm and had a little red spot on her forehead where she'd been sleeping.  She had tired eyes and a soft smile.  I used my finger to draw her face.  Her jawbone, her cheeks, her perfect nose, her tiny lips.  I kissed the top of her head and inhaled deeply.  And then I took the blanket I've used countless times in the middle of the night and wrapped it tightly around us.

I let her fall asleep in my arms.  I was supposed to go to the post office and drop off several packages.  I desperately needed to clean the house since my parents would be visiting in a few days.  I'd just made a batch of pumpkin muffins and the remaining batter was sitting on the counter.  But all I heard in my head, over and over again, was this: "Babies don't keep.  Babies don't keep."  And so I stayed with her.

I looked down at my beautiful girl and watched her dark eyelashes flutter and then become so still.  Her hand slowly lost its grip on my finger and I felt her entire body relax in my arms.  At that moment, I realized she felt safe and secure and loved.

And for 30 minutes of an otherwise ordinary day, I felt safe... and secure... and loved. 

8 comments:

Meghan said...

I loved this! Babies don't keep and with Vivi's time as an only child winding down I find myself letting her fall asleep in my arms more often. She only lets me do it at nap so I'm not worried about forming bad habits and holding that sweet relaxed baby (2 year olds are still babies, right?!?) and hearing that sigh of contentment is just perfect. It's why I'm terribly behind on holiday prep and housework but it is so worth it.

Laura said...

This made me tear up--it's so sweet and these experiences with my own kids just tug at my heart because I know they are fleeting!

J.B. said...

Years from now, you won't remember the pumpkin muffins or the presents, but you'll always remember that feeling of Sloane snuggled up close. What a wonderful moment to have.

Leslie said...

Those are the best moments. So glad you stopped to savor it.

The Echols Family said...

I'm crying my eyes out. Beautiful and perfect.

Amber Massey said...

This is perfect. Your Sweet Sloaney and Jude Dude and the luckiest.

Susie said...

And I'm crying as well...tears falling down my face! Precious, unforgettable moments.

Anonymous said...

Priceless, precious moments...I'm tearing up too. I cherish moments like that with my little Ethan... I know he won't be a baby forever.

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